Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Angry.

Now that I’m embarking on this new quest towards a skinny Sophie, I’m thinking there are some other things I should tackle in my life as well. For instance, the fact that I am angry 19 hours out of every day. I don’t know why…I just get so irritated with EVERYTHING. The cat, the dog hair that seems to gravitate towards all MY things, my husband, my daughter, dumbass pickup truck drivers who think they own the road just because they have 4 wheel drive…even a slow computer has been known to send me off the handle.

The worst part about it is the anger alone angers me even more. I end up going to bed at night wondering where this rage comes from, and if I will one day lose my husband and/or daughter because of it. I lived with an angry mother, and that is the last thing I want for my child.

This is me making an honest attempt at a more patient lifestyle…a step towards angerless parenting (until she is a teenager, at least)…a journey towards becoming a better wife, and somehow more importantly, a better mother. I need to find another outlet for my rage; yelling is not working. So this is what I will do when the anger starts a-boiling:
Come here and vent to you.
Go to the gym and sweat it out.
Lock myself in the bathroom with a tub full of hot water and a glass of wine.

Pray for me.

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